I didn't fart

Hey everybody!

Sorry to take so long to report in.  It's been a busy bee week.  I survived teaching the inaugural spin class (barely)!  

And of course I will give you the blow by blow.  So here you have it:

I was supposed to get to the gym by 9:15 so that my instructor who was letting me teach her class could get me set up.  I've never used the sound system/mic etc. so she was going to give me the quick run down.  I dropped off my son at school at 9:00 and it usually takes me 10 minutes or so to get to the gym.  Of course there just happened to be two separate lane closures this particular morning that slowed me down by about 5 minutes.  By the time I got to the gym I was already in my training heart rate zone and sweating like Richard Simmons.

I walk into the spin room and it's packed.  The first thing my instructor says to me is "I might have to take you off the bike at 20 minutes because I'm getting complaints and eye rolling from the regulars about having a new instructor teach the class."  I think it was at this point my bladder burst out of my body like the creature in Alien, screamed and started spurting urine on the floor.  (OK that part just happened in my head).

So I get on the bike and look out at the faces.  This is a tough crowd.  Some of the people are lovely, but there is a chunk that wouldn't crack a smile if you put them in a padded room filled with puppies and naked, peanut butter-slathered toddlers.  Thankfully, I had asked a couple of friends to come and they were in the back of the room right by the clock I had to keep checking because I couldn't figure out how to use my ipod for time keeping without hitting the wrong button and pausing the music.  Seeing their smiling faces was the only thing that kept me from losing my shit.

The class got underway and I was relaxing a little.  Getting used to talking over the music, gauging how much blabber is too much blabber, etc. is trickier than you think.  Then five minutes in the mic dies.  Luckily my instructor is a rock star and ran up to the office to get more batteries.  Meanwhile I'm yelling over The Black Eyed Peas (not easy since that Fergie likes to own the room).

Once the battery shenanigans were over, I think it went OK.  There were a couple parts of the class I would re-work for the next time, but all in all I didn't embarrass myself.  I'm looking forward to teaching again.

Then as a nice treat, I went into NYC that night to meet Mrs. Snack and go to a book signing.  She has an excellent synopsis of our evening on her blog, and because I'm a lazy ass I will simply link to it if you'd like to read all about it.  I will say that the book signing was with Heather B. Armstrong, creator of the most widely read blog in the country, dooce who is one FUNNY woman.  And she was wearing red lipstick.  Jealous.